Moving. This time around, it was so much harder than I ever anticipated which is really kind of strange, actually. Considering I moved five times in the last fourteen years (averaging a move about every three years), I thought that would qualify me as an expert.
I was used to this. I knew the process inside and out. The packing, organizing, planning, scheduling, rearranging and unpacking. I’ve done this many times before, so why was this move so different?
Well, for starters, this was our first move with two children. The last time we moved, my son was about 7 months old so he was in that bucket carrier and went wherever we went. If I needed to pack, he went in a bouncy seat. If I needed to unpack, he napped. It seemed far less complicated, that’s for sure.
And the prior moves before that? It was just me and the hubs. And in those early days, we didn’t have quite as much “stuff” to move. Once we were married and started to buy and sell, each place we purchased and sold was a little bit bigger than the one preceding with more and more furniture to move each time. Enter two children into the picture and you can imagine how much more “stuff” we accumulated over the years. It’s so true, you never really know how much useless STUFF you have until you have to pack it and haul it to the next place.
Well, this move certainly did me in.
Not only was the move so stressful, but both of my kids had to start new schools – so I needed to register them in new schools, find a new church and of course, learn how to get around town. I needed to know where the local supermarket, bank and gas station were located. I had to research and find all new doctors, pediatricians, dentists, etc. The reality was I had to complete all of these tasks in the midst of the actual big move…with two children – not an easy feat.
And the irony is, once we FINALLY landed here, I thought I would be happy.
I thought I would have everything I ever wanted – a gorgeous new home and wonderful schools for the kids – and yet, somehow, I was sad.
In some weird twist of fate, it was as though I was missing the life I left behind in another zip code.
I built a life for the last fifteen years in that area. All of my friends, neighbors and colleagues were there and I began to cry – I felt so alone in this new space.
I continued to cry.
And as I cried, my husband couldn’t figure out what was making me so miserable.
Nothing seemed to soothe me, I felt completely displaced. I felt as though I left one life behind and I wasn’t quite ready to jumpstart this new life just yet.
Perhaps I was mourning my old life, still putting the pieces back together before I could move on to the next…and through all of this emotion and turmoil, I somehow managed to get online, and that’s when the shift began.
All of a sudden, I re-entered a world that hadn’t changed since the move – the online friends I’ve grown to love were right there on my blog, Twitter and Facebook – untouched, still sharing, and still responding…it was the ONLY salvation I had during this move; it was the ONE thing that remained constant in my life.
It was the ONE thing in my life that was unchanged.
And perhaps, that’s what I was seeking.
I needed connection – and something familiar, something that reminded me of home.
So to all of you online friends throughout social media who helped me through those early days of the move these last couple of weeks, I thank you – it means more than you know.
And to any naysayer that says relationships made through this online world aren’t real?
Read this post again.
And then put THAT in your pipe and smoke it.
Big hugs to you! It does take time to get settled but so glad you could find comfort w/your online friends. It’s amazing how close we can feel to people we’ve never met. Best wishes to you and your family and your fresh start! XOXO
Thank you Tina! It’s been pure insanity, but we’re getting there!! Here’s to a new beginning 😉
The online community is just wonderful, isn’t it? I know I can always fall back on the people who are not just names on a screen, they’re friends.
Hope you’re settling in your new place!
Thank you Alison! Your comments and thoughts mean so much, it reminds me that the blogging world connects all of us more than we think.
xo
I love the online community. They’re always here for us to listen, cheer us up, and lend a helping hand.
I know that moving is hard but eventually things fall into place and it’ll be alright.
I am glad to see you back again though!
Hope you continue to get settled…I’m new here and already look forward to hearing from you! The online community is amazing!! Glad you have so many dear friends here to get you through the tough stuff!
M
I <3 you darlin.
any move you make, I'm coming with!!!
xoxoxo
I’m so glad you had that online stability during your real world upheaval!
We moved across several states when my two oldest were 4 and 2. It was horrible and stressful for all the reasons you described. Even though my two closest friends were now in the same state as me (each about 45 minutes away) I still felt incredibly alone.
I missed my grocery store, being greeted by my receptionist at my pediatrician’s office, I missed the clerk at my gas station, my Target, all those neighbors that weren’t friends, but who were familiar. It was devastating.
Having an online community like I have now would have been so appreciated.
I am so glad you see that this world is always here for you. I get you. I know how it stinks to be missing what you’re comfortable with in your day-to-day. It royally sucks sometimes. But we’re here (even when we’re not always here! Guilty!) whenever you need us! Sending you huge hugs!
I’m glad you had “us” to find solace. I have lived here for five years…the longest I’ve lived in one place as an adult and moving would be hard now, so I understand.
Being a military wife I can empathize with the constant moving and the adjustment period that comes with it and our online communities really do make a difference!! Big hugs as you begin life in your new home – I have no doubt you’ll settle in, make friends and start to feel more at home.
I just came across your blog for the first time, and this is a great, encouraging first read. I’m new to the blogging world, and I have been amazed at how supportive this community is. Thank you for sharing, and I look forward to reading more!
Love this post, love you. xo
Heather! I feel the same way and we haven’t even moved yet! It’s something we’ve been tossing around since my husband started his new job over a year ago. I don’t want to move, but I don’t think it’s fair that the hubs should have to commute. I love our town, it’s so cute and wonderful. The new one? I’m not a huge fan of it. And I’m not looking forward to the change.
I’m glad that you were able to find some solace from your online friends! That’s what this place is all about right?!
In 2011, I quit my job, moved away from the town I had lived in for the past 15 years, got married, had my first child, and lost my mom, who was my best friend. I still haven’t recovered:) But, the good news is that I started blooging a few months ago and so far, I love it! I am making friends and starting to discover this wonderfully connected community you describe. Cheers to blogging!