I have been really struggling the last few months with my 20 month-old daughter. I have not blogged about it since I have been unable to find the right words and quite frankly, I’m still trying to strike a balance between sharing my experience and staying somewhat private at the same time especially since it directly relates to her health – so I know I will find the right space in due time.
But I would like to share a few words with some people in public (and some directly in my life) that seem to have it all figured out. They are so quick to judge me and my daughter and to them I need to say:
When I’m at the doctor’s office, leave your snarky behavior at the door. I can’t stand the looks given to us from the adults without children as well as some of the receptionists. My little girl tries her best to be “good” in a space that is simply not made for children so cut us a break. We’re doing the best damn job we can.
When I’m at the store and my daughter is screaming please don’t glare at me like I am not doing enough, like I am some kind of “bad” mother. Don’t stare at me as if I have “no control” over my child. Instead of giving me such nasty looks offer me a smile or perhaps a few words of encouragement. Obviously, I am really struggling in the situation so your glares and stares are just adding to the drama.
When I’m out in public and my daughter throws a tantrum with full body movements that lasts for minutes don’t act like you’ve never been there before. Don’t look at me like I am a freak and my child is even more freakish. Don’t stop and stare and don’t judge me OR her. It wasn’t that long ago when you walked down that same road so just because your child is a teenager now don’t act like you haven’t been right where I am.
When I’m in your company and especially if I meet you for the first time, please don’t offer me advice when I don’t ask for it unless you are my own mother. I don’t care that your “picky eater” suddenly began to eat certain foods because of some miracle that you tried. Don’t act like you know the magic bullet that will help my kid or that your “advice” will automatically work just because you reached success with it. What worked for your child does not necessarily mean it will work for mine because motherhood is NOT one size fits all.
And although I used to enjoy conversing with other moms about the challenges of motherhood, the kind of attitude I have been getting lately feels more judgemental than supportive so I refuse to continue any kind of dialogue with these women. And I chose to publish this post because I know there are tons of other Theta Moms reading this right now who have experienced these SAME conversations with THOSE moms. This is exactly why I love my blog so much because I know that YOU get it.
The bottom line is that I am trying to cope the only way I know how on so many levels. This has been a part of motherhood I never knew existed nor experienced up until now.
So unless you’ve walked at least five minutes in my shoes don’t pass judgment on me or my daughter – because we are doing the best damn job we can right now.
I’ve often wondered if the world would suddenly become a much quieter place if we were all required to “walk a mile in someone else’s shoes” before uttering a word out loud. I think we could all use a little more understanding and a little less judgement – great topic!
.-= Dear Sydney´s last blog ..Daddy doesn’t speak spanish … =-.
do you really think all moms who are giving “advice” are judging? maybe some are genuinely trying to help. that part of your post seemed a bit harsh! if it was me talking to you in the park or something, giving my own experience it would be coming from a good place
gotta defend the nice moms out there!
.-= Harmskills´s last blog ..Lucky 13 =-.
I have many women in my life who share their experience and it comes from a good place. But I was speaking about some women who talk as if they could do a better job and that I am not trying hard enough – so if you never had a conversation like THAT with THOSE women, I would say you are a lucky mama!
yeah there are busy bodies and know it alls… and the whole unsolicited advice thing. I get it alot because my son is a late BF’er, and didn’t sttn until he was about 13 months old. I dont know what your situation is, and it sounds more private, so I’m sure the judgy comments dig even deeper.
Like with everything in life, there are gonna be haters out there… but there are good people left in this world!
.-= Harmskills´s last blog ..Lucky 13 =-.
Yup. Something about motherhood in some people that pushes them to look for opportunities to gush “I got it right, and you are clueless”.
I recently had an old friend and new mom chastise me and another mom friend (on my Facebook Wall!) about our toddlers not yet sleeping through the night when her 1 yr old already is. Now she has a nanny, she does not breastfeed, and she works very predictable hours. Whereas the other mom is a student, and I breastfeed and have irregular hours. None of this she asked about, but felt it ok to reprimand us (as if we were complaining) in a public tirade.
We as moms need to accept each other and support each other…
.-= When did I become my Mom´s last blog ..CSN Stores Review and Giveaway =-.
I think this is part of the problem. Everyone judges a situation on what they see in that short space of time and we shouldn’t. None of us know the background of a situation and therefore can’t really comment. We all make snap judgements all the time but acting on those and wading in with ‘advice’ isn’t necessarily the way forward.
I remember your ‘That Mom’ post from before and it’s in situations like this that the understanding look and smile can go a hell of a long way!
.-= Pumpkin and Piglet´s last blog ..What do you want to be when you grow up? =-.
You nailed it. We never really know what someone is dealing with at home, and five minutes at a store is no way for us to judge.
Dear Theta-
It’s ok. Sometimes you just need to let it out and we glad that you did. Because many of us do understand and wish that we could give you a big hug.
I must say, my kid tests me daily with his various medical problems. And I am so glad that I didn’t:
A) smack my aunt upside the head when she told me my kid would just eat when he is hungry, when we are all aware he will never eat without intense therapy (he eats through a tube)
B) Knock the pizza guy in the nose when he asked me if the “No Smoking — Oxygen” sign on my door was a joke (um..no)
and
C) Kick the doctor straight in the junk when he asserted that it was our problem.
You, my bloggy friend, are a graceful woman that you didn’t do any of those things. This is a forum where you can let it all out and we will all say, it’s ok, we love you!
You are a better woman than me
.-= Sarah M. (Travel Mommy)´s last blog ..The Power Problem =-.
Thank you for writing this post. All moms need to remember not to judge b/c we are all just doing the best that we can. Well said my dear!!
.-= Rachel @ Mommy Needs a Vacation´s last blog ..Recipe of the Week: My Mama’s Summer Vodka Cocktail =-.
I call those judgemental moms the “let’s compare the kids” moms. One size does not at all fit all. I have many times felt the way you do. I have 9 year old twins and today ran into someone who tried to explain that by not sending my kids away for a month, I’m harming them forever.
Keep doing what you’re doing and disregard the rest of the world!!
You are exactly right! Judgment is the last thing any of us need. Whenever I see a parent with a tantrum-ing child, I always just feel bad for the parent. Lots of times, I don’t even really notice. I’m so used to being around it myself (at home AND at work)! THOSE people aren’t worth your energy anymore! SO WHAT about THEM!
.-= Kristy´s last blog ..Daddy Anxiety =-.
Like you there are things I like to keep private about my life and daughter (not that you’d guess that reading my blog as I put a lot out there, but yes there are things best kept out of it especially related to my daughter). I will just say we had some things to work through at one time and although often I know Mom friends were trying to be helpful, there is that line that you have to know not to cross, when offering advice is not wanted and not helpful because every Mom is different as you say and so is every child and what works for some does not work for others.
Whatever your issues are with your daughter’s health I hope you are able to get the help and answers you need. A brave post, thank you for sharing.
.-= Aging Mommy´s last blog ..Friday Fragments =-.
Just two days ago, I was at a “party” (my husband’s Army coworkers) and somebody unmarried with no children (A GUY!) was trying to tell me how to get my son under control (hi, I’m pregnant… shut up!) and how he should be saying “please” at his age and not “more” since manners are important.
REALLY GUY!? REALLY?!
Keep going. I dare you.
My son is 2 years old, and he barely speaks because he’s had a delayed language acquisition thanks to constant ear infections. We do what we can, but he doesn’t understand a lot of things and still behaves like a younger child. What can you do, you know? I hate it when people assume I’m just lazy. Plus I’m nice and pregnant, so, my energy is simply not there! Who cares if he’s running around like a nut?! I sure don’t.
Aaah, parenting. Hang in there.
.-= Angela´s last blog ..busted saturday =-.
Amen!!
I wrote a post about this a couple months ago. I’m so sick of all the judgement that mother hand out to each other. Can’t we just be supportive and understanding, since we have either gone through it ourselves or will go through it.
.-= Katherine´s last blog ..On Family =-.
you know we got your back. and while I’m sure at some point (before we had kids) we used to judge those kinds of parents. i know i did. even when it was just my daughter… she was a very good kid. now, with my son… major melt downs at 17 months old…. so yes, i feel you. and if i ever see you out in public, i will walk up to you, give you a big hug and just walk away. 😉
“It wasn’t that long ago when you walked down that same road so just because your child is a teenager now don’t act like you haven’t been right where I am.”
I’ve been there. Here’s one that happened to me:
We flew to Florida with our 19 month old a few weeks ago. Our flight back was delayed, and ended up being from about 7pm-10pm. In front of me and my son (who had his own seat with his car seat strapped in to it) there were a mother and her teenage son. The boy was obviously looking for an empty row, and moved around a number of times before the flight attendant told him the plane was full and he’d have to remain in his seat until everyone boarded. As it turned out, there were a few seats open still at takeoff, and he claimed the empty row behind my husband’s seat. The mother immediately moved from her aisle seat to the window seat in front of my son. I warned her that I had taken my son’s shoes off, but that he could just barely kick her seat, I would try to prevent it, but he’s still a baby. I suggested that she might want to remain in front of me just in case. She ignored me.
And then she put her seat back.
And then she glared at me when my overtired, cooped up toddler was noisy, or pushed on her seat back with his tiny sock-feet.
I could have stopped him by holding them down, I suppose, but then he would have started screaming. “Which would she prefer?” I thought, before reminding myself that she could very damn well move to the seat in front of me and not have to worry about it.
She never moved. The entire trip. But she made sure to turn around and give me a dirty look or two. And I considered that her (obnoxious) son was just two rows back, demanding her credit card for movies and requesting that I “poke her” to get her attention.
Wonder where he learned that behavior?
I bet at my son’s age she got a lot more dirty looks that I did on that flight.
Oh Heather, I’m sorry that you’re going through a tough time. It makes me want to reach through the screen and hug you! Everyone knows how to be the perfect parent when their child is behaving, or before they have kids. It is amazing to me how people can act. Do you not see me struggling to occupy a preschooler and a toddler at the same time. Do you not see me trying to get my daughter to be quiet? Why on earth would anyone think I want her to be crying or throwing a toy? I am not dealing with the medical side of things as you are, but no matter what the circumstances, why is it the parents who are trying to be with their kids and solve a situation get the most dirty looks?
Sigh. It’s always something in this crazy adventure of motherhood, and it’s only worse when others try to make you feel badly. Your love for your children shines through your posts so tangibly it reaches your readers. Screw the naysayers.
Hugs. Big, fat, judgement free hugs.
Perfect comment, love it.
.-= Your Mommy Friend Lori´s last blog ..The Last Call =-.
I totally here you! I haven’t experienced much of it yet…I guess because I’m only 17 months into being a Mommy. And I don’t get out much since I’ve just had my second. But when I do go out…I really don’t like it when people look at me and say, “Wow, they are really close in age, huh? You sure are brave!”
What they don’t know is it took us 7 years to even get the first babe. I am 34 years old and we wanted more children. If it happened, it would happen and we wouldn’t be disappointed…we are elated that we didn’t have to wait another 7 years! There is nothing brave about it. It is what I wanted. *Hugs* to you and your little girl. To Hell with those who decide they are perfect enough to judge you. They aren’t.
.-= Stacey@MOAPM´s last blog ..Imagine If… =-.
I couldn’t agree with you more! Every mom is different, and every kid is different, and I’m a big believer in doing what works for you and your family. I think that mothers get WAY too judgemental and competitive with each other and it makes me nuts. We need to support and encourage each other, not strive to be the “better” mom!!
.-= The Mommyologist´s last blog ..Mom Sexy Prom Details =-.
Hi Theta Mom, I even have friends that will try to give advice. I just think that if you see a mom struggling, you really have to know when the best time to say something is. I really think people are insensitive sometimes or just think they know everything. I probably was more judge mental before I had children of my own and now I just give a smile and a nod to a mom having a hard day. It’s the best thing we can do for each other to let them know ‘we’re all going through the same thing!’ I’m over the 20 month phase. I had a three month old when my daughter was 20 months! It’s a chasing game and constant battles and at the same time, they are sooo cute.
take care, Christine Sebastian
This is a great post. I had to walk out of a store today because Peanut was freaking out. It happens sometimes – and I’m tired to people staring at me like I’m doing something wrong. Bottom line? People need to keep their mouths shut…about everything! If I had a nickel for every time I wanted to say “it’s none of your business whether my daughter is biological or adopted…and it doesn’t matter anyways!” well…you know…
.-= Sarah at The Stroller Ballet´s last blog ..Poopie at the park…yes or no? =-.
I know it is hard when you are going through it but EVERY Mother struggles with most of the same issues and you are not alone. What I know without a doubt are the ones who make obnoxious comments and shoot mean stares are usually the most unhappy people.
When I see a Mom in the store with an out of control child, I always smile at them and say “I remember those days.” ALWAYS and I can’t imagine ever being judgmental.
At the end of the day the only person you have to answer to and worry about, is your family. Just feel sorry for the rest and know that they must be very unhappy if that is how they treat others.
And don’t ever, ever forget that no matter what things look like on the outside, every Mother struggles if they are doing it right.
Hugs,
Sadie at heyMamas
.-= Sadie at heyMamas´s last blog ..The un-anniversary =-.
I’m sorry you are having a rough time with your daughter and the withering judgmental stares of others. I wrote about this topic in my “About Me” on my blog. I really wonder why motherhood cannot be more of a sisterhood instead of a competition.
All I can offer is cyber hugs.
.-= Karin Katherine´s last blog ..The lost post that you’ve been waiting for =-.
My daughter was diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder a year ago. She is 11 now. For the last 11 years I have been made to feel as if I was a bad mom; I was too hard on my daughter; what is wrong with me because nothing is wrong with her…on and on and on. Until recently, I felt I was the only one out there like me and yet since her diagnosis, I have found a lot of other moms out there…just like me.
I am giving you no advice, but this…whatever is going on, you are not alone…take care of your daughter, but don’t forget to take care of yourself.
.-= A Mother’s Hood´s last blog ..“It’s All Your Fault!” =-.
Yep to all you’ve written. Yep. Nod. Yep.
And {{hugs}} to you and all the moms who’ve also gone through this.
.-= Steph´s last blog ..Last Week =-.
Well said and I hope that I can do it the same way when I’m a mom (and not pass judgment now or later)
.-= Chic ‘n Cheap Living´s last blog ..Photo Love: Beacon of Hope =-.
Oh yes, they’re everywhere aren’t they – those ‘know it all, been there done that’ sort. Stick to your guns and ignore them the best that you can!
.-= Annette´s last blog ..The long weekend, a blue necklace and some favourite photography sites =-.
I am very much a “to each their own” type of person and mom. What works for me may not work for everyone else and vice versa. The only time I take issue and absolutely pass judgment is when there is a total lack of parenting at all. Lots of kids go though stages of temper tantrums or a case of the crazies in places that are adult friendly only (yes, the docs office is SO one of those places) and most parents are obviously mortified or frustrated – so who am I to tell them how to parent? So long as the parents are parenting, then they will get through it!
Good luck through this stage of life. Keep figuring out what works for you and you’ll get there
.-= Anne @ A JD + Three´s last blog ..I look a beached whale. =-.
I don’t know how ANY parent EVER can judge a tantrum. Parents know this is just the age. It just happens. The best parents in the WORLD have kids who tantrum. When I get looks just for taking my 1-year old into places, I just glare back. WTF, people? how else is he going to learn about social situations unless I PUT HIM IN THEM?! Well said. more people need to read this post!
.-= Katie´s last blog ..Keeping Our Business Local =-.
Amen! I have felt that way so many times. It’s as if the judgement weighs a thousand pounds and now we’re carrying that on top of a toddler that wants nothing to do with you or the present situation. It all feels so personal because people make it that way. The best situation I ever had was inside a Target and my eldest was in full tantrum mode, an older woman walked by and said, “Honey, you are doing great. Hang in there, this too shall pass.” That was what I needed to hear in that moment, just a word of encouragement that I wasn’t failing despite how it looked. We need to encourage each other!
.-= Your Mommy Friend Lori´s last blog ..The Last Call =-.
Amen. The compassion in this world certainly needs to increase. But I know that your compassion for others is heartfelt and genuine because you think the way you do. I wish there was more of it. Clone yourself?
.-= JennyMac´s last blog ..Traveling in style =-.
I get you..I have been there..you are not alone. Some mothers/strangers/people in general have never walked out path. Their loss I say because the good stuff is so sweet, we understand imperfection, we celebrate little successes. Those other “perfect” people are missing out.
I have walked in your shoes. I wrote about it, take a look so you know you are not the only Mom out there dealing with this issue. http://coastalchick.com/?p=163
Wonderful post, thank you for sharing!
.-= Kathryn´s last blog ..The Basement is done and I do my happy-happy joy dance =-.
Thank you for voicing what so many of us mothers have been thinking for years. Best of luck to you.
.-= Kel´s last blog ..Summer Learning Series: Learning With Easter Eggs =-.
I wrote a post a few weeks back about how I apparently have a very mean face, and therefore people seem afraid to give me unsolicited advice. It’s worked out thus far, and I recommend mean faces for all.
However, motherhood is hard. And I say all the time that all kids are different and all parents are different, and while it’s great to have resources from which to draw, they don’t work for everyone.
The most important thing is to have confidence in yourself as a parent. Know that what you are doing is done with your child’s best interest at heart and be proud of that. As with anything, the minute you show a chink in the armor, people (well-meaning and otherwise) are going to swoop in with their two cents, and it leads to so much frustration.
You sound like a great mom and this is a fabulous post.
And that’s my unsolicited two cents. It’s because you don’t have a mean face
.-= Jennifer @ three pugs & a baby´s last blog ..{ the week of father’s day } =-.
Bless you, Bless you, Bless you. I’m glad you wrote this:) I wish you didn’t have to.
.-= Daily Coping Skills´s last blog ..I’m Lost =-.
Very well said!!!
.-= gayle´s last blog ..Why Not? =-.
Agree and agree! I have been debating a post of the very same. The judgments, unsolicited advice, condemnation, competition and etc. are my least favorite parts of motherhood. My BFF totally put me and any other mom down who doesn’t have their child/children potty trained before 2. I tried my darndest for 3 days and he wasn’t getting it. Don’t tell me that success has to do with how persistent or how lazy the parent is…..my son wasn’t ready period but I gave it my all! I spent those three days and those immediately following crying and a total wreck because she’d made me feel like a total failure because my son wasn’t “getting it” or interested (unlike her children). Thank you for this post! We are all in the same boat and doing the best we can…why do we have to pass judgment!?!?
Amen, amen, amen, amen!!!! Oh, I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love and agree with this post! Yesterday, I got a I-can’t-believe-you judgement stare from a lady at the store. I felt about 3 inches tall. Afterward, I was telling my girlfriend about it and she said “Clearly, if someone has to double take and stare at you, they have no clue how hard life as a mother really is.” That made me feel a little better. It’s hard dealing with children, teaching them to become strong, capable adults. And when that judgment come from another mom, oh, that just sends me over the edge.
.-= A wife loved like the church´s last blog ..My Hannah, My Precious =-.
I was going to write a similar post today, but boy you did it way better than I could ever have done! I don;t know why people are so judgmental. Is it because they feel like they are better parents? Every kid is different. Yesterday I had to take my little guy for an x-ray. He was acting crabby from the morning but I had to do it. I decided to put him in a stroller because I had NO energy to chase him around the hospital. He didn;t like it! As I was waiting for the receptionist to call us, there was a lady, probably in her 60s, that was reading a magazine. Every time my little guy whined, she would peer over her magazine and give me a dirty look. It was so annoying. I was doing my best! I felt bad, but I couldn;t stop him. I think people forget how hard it is to be a mother. We must help each other other!!! Thanks again for the great post!
.-= Pres. Kathy´s last blog ..Carpal Tunnel =-.
i will kick someone’s ass for you if they are giving you problems. you KNOW i will cut a bitch for you, heather. LOL. but not really. because people like that piss me off.
.-= alexis´s last blog ..the olivia chronicles: letter two. =-.
Don’t worry, you’re fine. I once pretended I didn’t know G when he was 2. This was at ShopRite (grocery store back in Jersey.) He karate-kicked a canned tomato display. No kidding. Instead of helping, I studied the label of pasta. No way was I going to answer to that crap.
Kids make us nuts. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t be our kids.
.-= Crystal´s last blog ..TEARS for a Tiny Life Lost =-.
I SERIOUSLY could not have said that better myself. Amen sister!!! While I have no idea what you are going through, I can only imagine your frustration. My daughter is only 9 months and I’ve already experienced some of the same looks and judgments in public as well. All I want to say is mind your own business!!! Motherhood is definitely not a one size fits all thing. Lots of love and support your way! Us Moms need to stick together.
Oh, Heather, I am so sorry that you have been going through this. Nothing makes me more frustrated than judgmental moms.
Your post reminds me of a wonderful saying I learned from a stranger on a plane. About a year ago I was flying alone and a child two rows up was having a really hard time. The mom was obviously doing her best to calm her little girl, but we’ve all been there: sometimes our best is no match for their worst. A middle-aged woman across the aisle said something rude to the mother, at which point an older man said to the mom (loudly enough for all of us to hear): “The only people who should complain about kids are those who have never been kids themselves.” I love that idea and was so grateful to that guy for being an advocate for that mom at such a difficult moment.
Here’s to advocates everywhere – may one come into your life when you next need it.
.-= Kristen @ Motherese´s last blog ..Life After Yes, Chapters 23-33 =-.
HERE!HERE!!!! BRAVO!!!!
Thank you for saying what I have felt for quite a while! On behalf of many of us Mom’s who are ALL doing the best we can possibly do – I thank you for this post! That’s ALL I can say about it.
Brilliant!
.-= Leanne´s last blog ..Oh, the Places She’ll Go! =-.
my favorite is when other mothers look as if your child is the only one in the world that’s ever acted out.
unfortunately, some women like to believe they’re better than others regardless if they’re mothers or not. sad, but true.
.-= ericka @ alabaster cow´s last blog ..HAPPY 1ST ANNIVERSARY ALABASTER COW! =-.
So I’m gonna be the odd ball out of the bunch and say that although I most definitely understand where you’re coming from as a mother of 4 , ages 8,6,5, and 2 that always receive those deep rude stares from strangers for having more than the average 2 children everywhere we go (just as we did today while paying the light bill.)
My children have their days too, just like yours. And, every parent knows just like myself that their is not one perfect child out there that will behave 100% of the time. I myself have one child that was diagnosed with ODD and ADHD but I never allowed this diagnosis to become an excuse for my sons behavior. Is this because I know it all and I’m judgemental and comparing children?Absouletly not.
But,what does bother me I suppose when I see children like that is that the option to remove the child from the scenerio is always available (ex:restroom, a walk back into the car, the back of the store, fitting roooms…) In order to be considerate towards others since you are in a public setting and just the way that you want others to be considerate towards your situation so should you and others in this thread that think it’s some how okay for a child to act this way and expect others to smile and offer encouraging words.
Does it give them the right to be rude towards you or everyone else. Definitely NOT, okay. But you can’t expect them to be understanding and considerate towards you b/c you’re not being considerate towards them either and you are the one with the screaming child.
For all we know those that might be at the doctors office without children are there without them b/c they finally got a break or attempting to do their shopping (and this is their free time away from his/her children or grandchildren in which they hold custody of) or they might be dealing with some sort of stress and daily problem that just like they are unaware of your situation you are unaware of theirs as well .
So yes, after dealing with the daily grind of homeschooling 4 children and all that being a SAHM entails and my husband dealing with his daily grind in the military and all the stress that brings, when we finally are able to have some one on one time be it through doing the grocery shopping, heading to the library, going to movies, or by chosing to go out for an evening dinner date. I do believe that it is very inconsiderate in my opinion to just allow you’re child to continue throwing a tantrum, screaming, or skipping/squirming/running or doing whatever they are doing without removing the child momentarily so the child can calm down and allowing others to enjoy their time out where ever they happen to be as well.
.-= Momarchy´s last blog ..In the House of Screaming Silence =-.
I do know what you mean about being considerate. I never take my kids to a non-friendly kid place and we never eat late in the evening. We are always in and out before the dinner rush.
When I am getting x-rays or blood work, this environment is scary to a 20 month-old and the space is not suited for children as the pediatricians’ office is. So does my daughter throw a fit? Yes, and are there times I do take her out to calm her or remove her from the situation completely? Yes. But if she’s crying in the cart at Target for a few minutes and what I’ve tried working does not work, this is when I feel judged and I wish others would remember back to a time when they were there because it happens to the best of us.
hey lady,
Sounds like you’ve been having a rough time of it too and I certainly hope things ease up for you. There seems to be this weird phenomenon where some moms can’t feel like they’re doing it right unless that means someone else is doing it wrong. As you said, every family is different and you’ve got to find what works for you and your child. take care!
I am so sorry you are having a rough time with your daughter. I can completely relate. My daughter has a pediatric feeding disorder (she goes above and beyond picky eating) and everybody thinks they have the answer for me. It can be so infuriating! I’m sorry you have to deal with it.
I am in full agreement. I’ve actually written about it in the past, with regards to how we should treat parents and kids going through public tantrums. We should help other parents going through this, not judge them
.-= Hear Mum Roar´s last blog ..Flowers are red =-.
Amen! And sing it, sister.
If you can’t lend me a hand, then shuttup!
.-= Alexandra´s last blog ..Baby Villa =-.
Now that I’m a mom….of a major tantrum thrower…I will never, EVER again look at a mom whose child is throwing one and raise my eyebrow. Instead, I agree with what you said – I smile and maybe a quick “well at least you know the tantrum will stop eventually!” has become more my style.
.-= Natalie´s last blog ..You Know You’re A Mom When-sDaze =-.
I couldn’t agree more actually. It seems to me that women love to get together and “chat” it up about “best” practices. Often, those “chats” are spurred by what they have witnessed with someone else’s child.
Shrug it off. You are not alone. There are plenty of us out there with you who are just doing the best we can. I will say this though…don’t feel such a strong need to defend. Just let it go, and rise above…knowing that you are doing the best job you can, and that those dagger throwers have been there before.
.-= arizonamamma´s last blog ..You Know You’re a Mom When-sDAZE =-.