Today’s featured blogger is Mary from The Mommyologist. Mary had just started her blogging journey about the same time that I moved to WordPress. Since then we’ve been blogging together ever since. She is a supportive blogger who knows how to put fun back into motherhood and her recent quest is starting the mommy movement to bring “Mom Sexy” back! And when you read how Mary describes her blog, you will see that she is a total Theta Mom, one of the many reasons I adore her blog:
“My name is Mary and I have been a stay-at-home Mom for a little over four years. I have an absolutely adorable little boy who is a complete and total future comedian in the making! He keeps me on my toes and reminds me everyday of what is truly important in life. He is my whole world, and I feel honored to be his mother. And being a mommy is wonderful, but I had a much more difficult time making the transition from career woman to diaper changing diva than I thought I would!
Before I had my son, I was a meeting planner and was always jetting off to some exciting city and staying in beautiful hotels and going out to fancy dinners. When I became pregnant, my husband and I made the decision that my career just wasn’t conducive to life with a child, so we made the decision for me to give up my job and stay home. It was definitely the right decision, but it proved to be a huge adjustment for me.
All during my pregnancy, people kept telling me what a blessing having a child was and how everything was going to be perfect and how I wouldn’t be able to imagine my life before I had that child. They were right, motherhood IS a blessing, and I TRULY loved my child more than anything else on the face of the earth, but things were definitely NOT perfect, and for a while, I found myself sort of “mourning” my old life. I missed sleeping through the night. I missed taking a shower every day. I missed being able to sit on the couch and read a magazine whenever I wanted. I missed going out to dinner and sharing a bottle of wine with my husband. And the fact that I missed my former free-spirit self did not mean that I loved my baby any less. But it sure made me feel like a failure as a mom. I had never felt so guilty about anything else in my life up until that point.
It wasn’t until I started talking to some of my girlfriends who’d had babies that I realized that the feelings I were having were pretty much the norm, it’s just that no one really talks about them. It’s almost like people live in fear of bursting a pregnant chick’s bubble, so they hold back some of the nitty gritty details and just elaborate on all the sugar coated stuff.
And then when women deliver their babies and are experiencing some of those “not-so-rosy” feelings, they keep them hidden and instead talk about “how GREAT everything is” instead of revealing the REAL story because they worry about being judged by other moms. I firmly believe that if mothers were more open and honest with each other about the changes in life that come with having a child, then we would feel much less isolated and alone. We need to band together instead of turning motherhood into a big competition!
My goal in writing The Mommyologist is to provide a “go-to” place where mothers and women in general can go to take a break from their hectic day and get a much needed laugh. I believe that by sharing my stories with other women and laughing at myself, that I have the potential to save some other new moms a few sob-sessions along their journey. If I can help one mommy out there feel a little bit better about her situation and feel like she is not alone, then I’ve more than accomplished my goal in writing this blog. I tell it like it is, and sometimes I am probably a bit too honest for my own good, but I’m sticking to my guns and going with the whole honesty vibe. I hope that you’ll stop by and laugh with me!”
So be sure to show her some TMC love on the blog and follow her on Twitter!
Soooo right! I am sick of the competition! I wish we would just support eachother! I’ve made it a point…that when I see a white knuckled mom counting under her breath because her 2 year old is throwing a fit in the middle of Target…to walk up, smile and say “It’s hard somedays isn’t it? Keep up the good work! Hang in there!” You can just watch the tension melt. As opposed, of course, to the people who are giving her the look of death, because, you know, their kids must have been perfect. ha!
.-= jeannett´s last blog ..Springtime/Tax Time =-.
I just had to comment Jeannett and say AMEN to that! We are all THAT MOM in Target about to lose every ounce of patience, and the stares from others make it far worse. Thank you for reminding us that we ARE doing a damn good job!
I LOVE The Mommyologist…She’s the best!
What a great philosphy. You’re absolutely right, of course…Motherhood is not all sunshine and roses. It’s hard and it’s a BIG life change. Good for you for not bottling all that up.
.-= Lindsay @ Just My Blog´s last blog ..Bananas4Bows Giveaway (Ends 4/22) =-.
Hi,
I enjoyed this and yes you are right we are a competive lot. LOL Although I see a lot of change for Mom’s to become a community instead of I am a better mother than you.
When mine were little pre-schoolers, I spent so much time striving for perfection. My house was spotless. There was no way another Mom was coming in my house and I not pass the white glove test. LOL
I am much more relaxed now, as a matter of fact my husbands clean clothes from the laundry room are sitting on the hallway cabinet countertop as we speak.
Relax comunicate and enjoy the other mommies, your child and you life in what ever order you see fit. Loved your blog.
Teresa Wilkinson
Congrats Mary!!!! {hugs} Love ya
!
.-= Niki @ Ambitious Gurl´s last blog ..Friday Follow: A Celebration of Followers – April 16 =-.
Looking forward to checking out the FB. Nothing beats a fresh, honest take on this adventure we’ve all undertaken when we decided to become parents!
I agree Katie – sounds like a Theta Mom to me! 😉
Oh, Mommyologist, how I adore you! Congrats on your TMC Day!
.-= MandyP´s last blog ..Friday Follow =-.
Mary… Congrats! Love your blogs and what you stand for and I also think your pretty funny too
Awesome post – and soooooo true!
.-= Stephanie @ Figments´s last blog ..Photobooth fun =-.
Amen sister! I’m all about keeping it real even when it’s not so pretty. I’ll be sure to check out your blog. You sound like my kind of momma! Cheers!
I love the Mommyologist!
She definitely has a point that few people talk about the nitty gritty of giving birth and being a mom. I think that’s why many of us feel alone when we’re having a rough time. Coming together and talking about this stuff more often is something that needs to be done more often!
.-= All You Need is Love´s last blog ..Suggestions are Advisable =-.
I’m a BIG fan of the Mommyologist! She was one of the first blogs I started following.
.-= Accustomed Chaos´s last blog ..Follow Friday: Guest Blog Post @ AMWIND =-.
I am humbled by all of these amazing comments!! Thank you so much for making my day ladies…and I’m so glad that we are all coming together as moms to support each other and laugh!!
.-= The Mommyologist´s last blog ..It’s My TMC Day! =-.
Great choice for Featured Blogger! Love The Mommyologist! This is a great post which resonates with all moms whether they are stay-at-home or work-out-of-the-home moms! All moms experience that phase where we are trying to find and define ourselves in those moms after childbirth.
My youngest sister is due any day now with her first, and I am going to be sending her a list of “mom” blogs to follow. Mommyologist will be one of them.
Dana
.-= Bungalow’56´s last blog ..Spring Had Sprung….Just Not Where I Was Looking. =-.
I love the Mommyologist. And she’s totally right. All we need is a little laughter and it will make motherhood so much easier. You made a great choice in choosing the Mommyologist as your featured blogger!
I guess I’m lucky – I found a fab group of friends in the new moms support group at the hospital where we all delivered our first babies. More than 6 years later, we’re still friends – and we have DEFINITELY shared the whole gamut of becoming a mom, good AND bad.
.-= SpecialSauce in the House´s last blog ..Got (clogged) milk (ducts)? =-.
Congrats Mary on your ThetaMom day. Parenthood is not for the weak!
.-= Italian Mama Chef´s last blog ..Pasta with Chicken and Bacon-new recipe! =-.
Mmmhmmm. Agreed — Motherhood is more difficult than you think, and you don’t find that out until it’s too late.
.-= GlowinGirl´s last blog ..My Favorite SPRING Things (Friendly Friday) =-.
Yay Mary…….I love you anyway….Congrats on being the TMC featured Blogger xxx
.-= Emma´s last blog ..Officially a Slacker!!!! =-.
As a mom with a special needs kiddo I couldn’t agree with the mom competition thing. Instead of staring at us when my son is doing something they may not find “normal”, how about smile and give me eye contact. Or ask questions…something other than staring. We are all moms and not all of our mom moments are going to be stellar.
off to read more!
.-= Kerry´s last blog ..Friday Ramblings By Paul =-.
Going to her blog right now! What she describes matches so closely with my experience. I MOURNED the loss of my professional life and still do sometimes, to be honest. Can’t wait to read more of her blog!
Happy Friday, Theta Moms!
.-= Missy´s last blog ..So Many New Friends =-.
Hi Heather!
I’ve visited the Mommyologist before … she’s great! Hey, I have a question… I’ve tried to join the TMC Community you so geniously created, but I couldn’t find out how to do it! ;0) How do you join? I’m sure it’s obvious and I’m just missing it somehow! ;0)
Melinda –
We would love to have you! 😉 Here is the link – http://www.thetamom.com/theta-mom-community/
Basically, scroll down past my post with the directions and this is where you would add your listing (in the comment section with the name of your blog and add a description) and grab the TMC button – so easy!
Happy TMC day! What a great intro – giving up what sounds like an amazing career to start an even better one! Perfect.
.-= Beth @ Laugh Until You Cry´s last blog ..Its Friday! =-.
yay! i’ve visited the mommyologist before and can’t wait to visit her again!
.-= ericka @ alabastercow´s last blog ..dear whole foods, =-.
How did I miss this yesterday. I have been so busy and sick so I have been out of the bloggy loop.
But….I love love love the Mommyologist. She always makes me laugh. Great FB to have.
.-= This Mama Works It!´s last blog ..Let Me Take A Few Steps Back Because I Still Have A Lot Of Debt To Get Paid Off =-.
YES! Love the Mommyologist and really appreciate her “Mom Sexy” movement! Another great choice and congratulations again!
.-= Your Mommy Friend Lori´s last blog ..Mommy Friend Gone Wild: Sushi =-.
Very well said! I’ve got a six month old, and I’m still having a hard time dealing with this changeover. I love her more than anything ever, but it’s just hard not having my old life. Thanks for sharing!
.-= christine´s last blog ..Blog Design Giveaway =-.
Yea on being featured
.-= beth aka confusedhomemaker´s last blog ..Cinnamon Swirl Pancakes =-.